Kids Say the Darndest Things - July '11 Edition

Taken from the sidebar....

(Background Info) Often when we're looking at old family photos [pre-Miss B life] she will ask where she is and we explain to her, "You weren't born yet."
So, Miss B was carrying around a photo of herself this morning.

Me: "Who's in that picture, Brookelle?"
Brookelle: "Me. Just me. Not you, Mom - You weren't born yet!" 7/11

Female Bonding

On a recent day, I put Miss B's hair in pig tails.

Everyone thought it was soooo cute!

But, when anyone told her so, she responded with one of her classic grumpy looks.

So, then the other girls decided that's how they wanted their hair done the next day!
And to make their GIRL PIG TAIL DREAMS complete, they begged me to also do my hair that way, so we could be quadruplets!!!! OK - just the perfect hair do for a 40 yr. old! :)
And these pig tails came in handy since that was the day we happened to go to the Bingham Copper Mine -- always a WIND TUNNEL-esque thing going on there!!

THIS should earn me "Mommy Brownie Points" right?!?

I Just Don't Get It

Ever since we moved to Farmington, I have made it a tradition to run the 5K/10K races on our town's annual celebration, "Festival Days." With the exception of one other year, I have been the sole participant from our family, although everyone else is always welcome. (And it has been a "dream" of mine that we all run it together.) When we were writing our "Summer Bucket List" at the beginning of June, I was pleased that one of Ryan's SBL items was running the Farmington Festival Days 5K as a family. There were some snickers, rolling of eyes, looks of "yeah, right!" and general lack of enthusiasm, but it was NOT vetoed off the SBL.

Soooo....I have spent the Summer getting up early five mornings a week and going out "training." I have got up while Matt was still snoring away in the bed next to me. I have wished I could still be in the bed next to him! I have, most mornings, NOT wanted to get up and go run. BUT, I have. I have while Kyle & Katelyn waited, hiding in the cubby hole under the stairs, until I left so they could sit there [on their butts] watching on early morning T.V. I have gone out while Ryan & Haylee were still dead to the world in deep slumber. And when I returned home from running, the "activities" of my family still resembled that of the life of a SLUG.

Prior to the race, Matt & the boys went out a total of TWO different evenings running/walking/jumping around (Kyle).

Katelyn had WALKED a little over 2 miles with me - ONCE.

Haylee had NEVER gone out and trained whatsoever.

However, Miss B has become quite the proficient "stroller rider" - she has years of experience!

So, help me understand HOW ON EARTH, THAT kind of "preparation" got these kind of results:

FIRST to finish from our family: Kyle (No adult available to take photos)

SECOND: Matt - pushing Miss B in the jogging stroller the whole way.

THIRD: Haylee
15 yards ahead of....

FOURTH: Ryan

And then they all hung around.....waiting....and waiting...and waiting. It was later reported to me by my kids that, while they were waiting, Matt was voicing concerns like Did they get lost? Did they get injured along the way? Is Mom passed out?

(Thanks, Honey!)

Until finally....

FIFTH: Katelyn
SIXTH: Me

They were all well rested, while my heart was still pounding and sweat was dripping down all over my body, by the time we were able to all get together for this post-race group shot.

I will say that I [took the higher road and] volunteered to stay with the girls, so they wouldn't get lost or be alone. Turns out, Haylee didn't even need me - she left me in the dust during the first half mile. She ran the whole thing. Never ran one step prior to the race and then beats the majority of us! I just Don't get it!

Katelyn, on the other hand, needed me repeating the mantra of The Little Engine that Could to her every other minute. I think I Can. I think I Can. I think I Can. Because after she ran the first mile and a half - SHE WAS ABLE TO RUN A WHOLE MILE AND A HALF STRAIGHT WITHOUT HAVING PRACTICED RUNNING BEFORE (I just Don't get it) - she spent the next mile and a half whining/crying/complaining, I can't do this, I'm NOT running next year, I can't do this, My feet hurt, I can't do this, WHY did you make me do this - I didn't want to, I can't do this, My tummy hurts, This is too hard, I can't do this, My ear hurts, I can't do this.

After she ran that first mile and a half, I let her walk, and held her hand most of the rest of the race.

Then we ran for five minutes.

Then we walked some.

Then we ran for three minutes.

Then we walked.

Then we ran for one minute. (I was losing her!)

Then we walked.

Then I pulled her, running the last stretch, because you HAVE to run the last stretch across the finish line - it's one of [my] unwritten rules...then sent/pushed her ahead to finish before me at the last moment. But, truth be told, our overall pace was very comfortable for me! I'm glad I had the "excuse!" :)

It was eerily similar to when I made Kyle do it with me four years ago when he was age 7. And now, fast forward to this year and look how far he's come, baby...

He got the "Gold Medal" - finishing 1st Place in his age group - with a time of just 22 minutes! I just Don't get it.

And THEN, during the medal ceremony, Matt's name [unexpectedly] got called, too! He got the "Bronze Medal" - finishing 3rd in his age group - running a faster 5K than I have ever run in all my years (30+) of racing with a time of 28:00. I just Don't get it. Matt did say it helped that, with his 40th birthday this year, it bumped him up to the 40-49 age group. He was considered the young, spry one in the group. But, still.....he ran twice this summer. The only other cardio exercise he can claim is playing on a Indoor Soccer team....but this summer, it's been very sporadic - only 1-2 times a month.

Even though "I just Don't get" (AND IT'S SOOO NOT FAIR!) with my family's training/performance ratio, I am glad we did it TOGETHER. It is a fun tradition that we will continue for years to come.

{Hopefully, it's like childbirth - and Katelyn will have forgotten the "pain" by next year!}

My "Smash"ogram

I turned 40 yrs. old 9 1/2 months ago.

Women know what THAT means.....I've moved into the "Mammogram years."

So, do you think I ran right out and got one 9 1/2 months ago?

NOPE.

Do you think I've had the written orders from my Dr. for months and months just attached to my magnet board at home?

YEP.

I guess my avoidance of the "experience" is part rebellion that I actually have gotten old enough to need one, part fear that the test might find something BAD, part dread of the inconvenience of having to arrange care for or (heaven forbid) take my little ones to the appointment, but MOSTLY it's been my qualms about the pain associated with having my boobs smashed flat as a pancake.

Since school got out, and I have 2 "live-in babysitter" now, at least one of my "hang ups" was gone, so I thought I could finally try to make an appointment. Now, even though I was calling, I thought I still had quite a bit of time. You see, I was completely expecting it to be more like my Pediatrician's office when I call in for an appt. there,

"It looks like Dr. Fruin is booked out until the end of October...."

(Just goes to show that MORE parents are trying to get their kids in for their school shots and Football Physicals than there are women taking care of their own mammograms) but that wasn't the case! The "Women's Imaging" department at the hospital had available appointment that same week! Like in a few days. Luckily, some out of town trips and my work schedule prevented that from happening, but I still got me an appt. within 10 days of calling.

YIKES.

That was too soon for me!

The day of the appointment, Ryan asked me if I was nervous. I admitted that I was.

He said, "Don't worry, Mom, I saw a billboard on the freeway about mammograms. Did you know that with early prevention, Breast Cancer is 99% curable?"

(Yes, I know. I'd seen those same guilt-inducing billboards prodding me over the last 9 1/2 months!)

I told him I was not so much worried about that as I was the pain. To which he had a question about WHY is would be painful. So, I got to explain to my 15 yr. old son about the boob torture machine.

He was horrified - mostly because of what he was thinking about. His next question let me in on his thoughts? "Do they have to do that to screen for Prostate Cancer, too?!!?"

So....I made it to my appointment....

When they questioned me, I turned out to be a real boring patient. No Breast Implants, No chance of being pregnant, No Breast Cancer history in my family, Not currently Breast Feeding, No Breast Surgeries, No discoveries in my self-exams (that's because I DON'T do them! woops!)

Getting in the right position took longer than the smash-and-X-ray part of it. Turns out I have breast tissue up to my chin, in my underarm regions, and around my back - and they needed it ALL on the compression plate.

The tech gave so many instructions:

Lean forward

Stick out your butt

Lift up your arm

Relax your shoulder

Straighten out your hips

Put your weight on your right foot

Come closer

Don't stand on your tippy toes (I'm too short, they need to bring the machine down)

Bend your left knee

Lift up your chin

Hold your other breast out of the way...but flatten out your hand, so it doesn't get in the picture.

Move your hair back

Hold perfectly still - don't breathe.

{It was a QUAD workout, let me tell you!}

Finally, when I still wasn't in the optimum position, the tech just started manhandling (cupping, pulling, moving, shifting, lifting) my boobs herself. Ya know, 20 years ago, I would've FREAKED OUT over that (at my first GYNO appt. for my pre-mission physical, the nurse had to practically hypnotize me in order for me to survive!), but strangely, that day, after 5 baby births, several female surgeries/procedures, and dozens of "special woman exams", I was pretty OK with being topless in front of and groped by the nurse. :) hahaha.

I made it...but my ANGST about the pain, it turns out, WAS VALID. I drove straight to the Maverick afterwards and got some "pain meds" in the form of a large Diet Dr. Pepper.

And I texted my husband warning him that he may not recognize his wife now! ;)