Five Words

One of the main things I took away from the "Queen of the Kingdom" conference last weekend was about WORDS.

Words are so important.

Right from the beginning of the conference, our presenter/mentor wanted us to write down just three words on our name tag that we wanted to be....it was just to get our mind starting to think in that direction.
There's so many words - and we could choose ANY of the hundreds of thousands that exist in our English language EXCEPT we were not allowed to choose "uptight," "rigid," or "controlling."  ;)  Those were words that had she had drawn the "no symbol" (ya know that red circle with a diagonal line through it?) on her giant post-it paper pad up front, because those traits ruin our femininity and are not characteristics of a "queen."

Later, we practiced saying general declarations that were written in our class book, out loud, with the group, to get us used to saying positive words about ourselves.
We even got to "play with" (draw from it's sheath and raise above our heads) a Gandalf-esque sword

while declaring, "I am a goddess of truth and light!"  Having a sword makes a difference, I tell ya!  (you should try it!)  It gives you the feeling that you've got power.  Like what you are saying is official, holds some clout!  ;)

Anyway, those were just some of the activities (there were many others) we did throughout the conference to get us in the frame of mind to choose words for ourself. 

By the end of the weekend, I chose five words.

Calm

Compassionate

Healthy

Energetic

Delightful

When I am going about my day; when I am wiping down the kitchen counters, while I put away clothes, when I'm on the phone with a not-so-happy customer at work.... I repeat this phrase to myself.  "I am a calm, compassionate, healthy, energetic, delightful woman."  I have been saying it daily (sometimes multiple times).  My plan is to keep saying it a lot. 
When I don't feel like getting up early in the morning to go out exercising, I say it in my mind. 
When I look in the mirror, and I think, "bleh," I say it in my mind. 
The other day, when I was leaving the check out at Costco after I'd just purchased a large amount of items (who doesn't have a large amount of items when they go to Costco?) and had had some problems that came up while checking out, I heard the cashier greet his next customer after me, "How are you today?"  And I heard her reply loudly-enough-so-that-I-could hear, "Well, I was fine until I got in line behind that lady!"  I repeated my words (with emphasis on calm, compassionate, and delightful!) in my mind over and over and over the whole way out of the store, through the parking lot, while unloading all my stuff (that caused a long check out), and even after I got into the car!!  ;)
When I got really upset at home (no!) towards a particular person (who shall remain nameless) and situation, I said this phrase in my mind all evening!

I didn't choose the words calm, compassionate, healthy, energetic, and delightful because that's what I believe I am....I chose them because I struggle to believe those things about myself.  And I can tell you, the more I have repeated that in my mind, the more calm, compassionate, healthy, energetic and delightful I have been able to feel in that moment.  Can it be that I am starting to believe them more?  It gives me strength to do things I might otherwise not have done.

These words can. change. me.
(Because that was another mantra of the conference, "For things to change, I must change.")

Just five words - out of thousands.

(Though, as I write this, it’s past meal time and I don't have any plans to make it and I let a stream of complaints and general disgruntlement flow out of my mouth earlier.  And there's the fact that I still haven't gotten around to doing some of our "SBL" outings this summer.  And when my son reminded me for the third (+) time that he STILL needs new soccer cleats due to his first game being in just 2 1/2 weeks, and my youngest [unedited] daughter asks why I have all those "red dots" on my chin…  I should have responded, “Because I’m HEALTHY…and ENERGETIC…and DELIGHTFUL…”)

So......

What are your words?

What are THESE?

The temperatures have DROPPED way low here in our neck of the woods.  Thanks to the November-that-feels-like-January we're having due to the Arctic Chill that has come from the North, affecting most of  the U.S.

(Yet, ANOTHER rude awakening in returning from our Eastern Caribbean cruise.  The Islands, high 80's.  Utah, 30's.)

So, Brookelle was complaining she didn't have any warm clothes to wear.  It's true - I hadn't done the official [season changing] closet/drawer clean out project, changing all the short sleeves/capris/shorts/lightweight fabrics and replacing them with the winter clothes - it was still in the 70's when I left!

So, I pulled the big Rubbermaid tote of "Size 6 Winter clothes" out of the basement that I'd been storing ever since Katelyn outgrew them 4 years ago (AND which had many hand-me-downs of Haylee's from before then, too!)

Usually this ritual is like "Christmas," opening up a plethora of  outfits to wear; an instant "new" wardrobe!  The girls & I get all sentimental, while gushing, "Oh, I loved this!  This is soooo cute!" remembering the clothes they used to wear, and what event they wore them for, etc.

THIS TIME when Brookelle started pulling out all the long pants (the main thing she was looking for), it was NOT like that.  She was NOT thrilled or impressed or even grateful.

Her response was more like......

What are THESE?!!?

When I answered, "pants," she started to giggle.

SHE SERIOUSLY THOUGHT I WAS JOKING/TEASING (like I frequently do, and she's become pretty good at discerning when I am, based on the absurdity of what I say)
so she responded, "No, they're not!"

To which I replied, "Yes. They ARE."

She retorted, "What's wrong with the bottoms???"

I said, "They're flare jeans."

Brookelle:  "Flare???  WHY would they make them FLARE?"

Me:  "Because they're cute!"

Brookelle:  (giggling, thinking I'm joking again) "No, they're not!"

They're not?????  

But, your sisters wore them!

They used to be!

And then I realized that sometime between the last 4-6 years and the modern day, flare jeans must have gone the way of the dust.  In Brookelle's [short!] lifetime, she has never been exposed to flare jeans and, therefore, has absolutely NO understanding/attraction to them.  In her opinion, they belong in the costume box, categorized under, "clown pants" MORE THAN they belong in a sane person's closet!!
Skinny jeans are acceptable, though!  ;)

(Weird to think that I'M living through style changes!  Isn't that just for old people?)

CRAP!  Now she still doesn't have any warm bottoms to wear!  

Is Christmas too far away to wait to get new clothes?!?

The End of my YW Era

I got released from my church calling as 1st Counselor in the Young Womens' Presidency.

Siiiiggghhhhhhhhhh.

Such mixed emotions about all of this.

I've been serving in that position for going on 3 years now.

THREE!
That's 130 mutual activities, 75 meetings, Three Young Women in Excellence events, Three New Beginnings events, Three Girl's Camps (1 with my daughter, Haylee, in attendance!), three youth conference (attended one, helped/supported on the other two), a few culminating events and dinners for all the youth, dozens of hours on the phone and visiting homes, and on & on.....

I have come to love "my girls".  I thought about them and worried about them all the time.  I considered them an extension of my own children who live in my home with me.  Whenever I referred to them in conversation, I called them, "My young women....."

This calling, and each young woman, has been such a HUGE part of my life for the past few years.

I SO SO wanted each girl to have their testimonies strengthened during this very important & amazing time of THEIR life.   AND on various occasions, THEY shared an experience or scripture in class, or gave a talk in a meeting, or bore their testimony at camp & youth conference, and it strengthened MY testimony.

They will forever be apart of me.....I swear, when I am in my 80's, and if I run into one of them, I will hug them, then still call them, "my girl" (even thought they will be in their 50's!!!)

I am incredibly BLESSED to have had this opportunity!

I knew though...with serving for that amount of time...that this day would someday come.

Being in a Young Women's Presidency is A LOT of work.

It consumes MOST {if not ALL} of your extra time.

Mutual, lessons, firesides, Girls Camp, tending to the girls' needs, supporting the president & making sure she doesn't take on too much work....it is CONSTANT.
And, THAT SERVICE I gave is WHY I ended up loving them.....You LOVE who you SERVE!

And while I have {honestly} had some frustrations & heartbreak along the way (they are ATTACHED to their cell phones a little TOO MUCH!, they are, at times, persuaded by the ways of the world more than the church standards, and sometimes they chose not to join us in our mid-week & summer activities or at church on Sunday) but for the majority of the time, I LOVED it.....

I knew ahead of time I was being released.  My Bishop came to my home last week to extended a release - and thanked me profusely.  But, when it was officially announced in Sacrament meeting before the congregation, it became "official" to me - and I am sad.
I think I'll go into "mourning" - I can joke about that because I'll actually be gone for a couple of Sundays in July due to traveling....but it's kinda true.
I knew I'd be sad, but I also thought I would be relieved.  It was a LOT of work and there were so many other things on my plate that I could not keep up with for the life of me.

But man, I miss those girls already - more than I could have ever realized I would.  I'm thinking about them all individually and am going to write them all a letter letting them know of my feelings.  The relief I expected has not come yet.  It will take a little while to find peace with this big change in my life right now.

Good thing I sobbed my way through my final YW lesson -- NOT!  (little did I know, at the time, it was THE LAST)

I still need to pass off all my stuff to the new Young Women's 1st Counselor, but I might drag my feet a little bit - because maybe I won't be able to bear it?!?

I'll probably linger outside their classroom on Sundays and it'll feel so weird to send off Kyle and Haylee to their activities on Wednesday nights and not go, too.

Gradually I will start to feel how nice it is not to have to worry about all the logistics that went into every activity, every meeting, every group text, everything I was SUPPOSE TO be doing and couldn't quite get to.

Of course, other things will pile into my life and fill up every nook and cranny the Young Women things left behind (like getting Ryan ready to leave on his mission in 5 1/2 weeks!!), but oh, how grateful I am for that experience with those girls and I will always have a special spot in my heart for them and all the wonderful things I learned as their leader.

YES.......

Life goes on.

{We don't get to choose what church calling we will be given, but IF I COULD, I'd want to be the primary pianist for my next calling!  How could I NOT LOVE doing that?  Gosh, ANYTHING after being in the Young Women's presidency should seem like a walk in the park, right?  I would want the piano calling .....IF I could even play the piano well enough!!!  haha!  I don't know how to sight read!  Is that unusual?  I took piano lessons for 8 years - how long do you have to take to actually get good at it???  It maybe has something more to do with HOW MUCH I practiced - or how effectively/consistently I practiced (or didn't) during those years!!}

My faith is a HUGE part of who I am.

I thank my lucky stars each day for the knowledge of the Gospel that I have.

I look forward to what the future has in store for me now.

I hope you'll enjoy the ride with me!!

Realization Strikes

FIRST, it is the sad truth we no longer have something very darling/delicious/dreamy in our home.  Not a single ONESIE (the absolute cutest, most adorable, easiest to put on (even for men!), biggest I-just-want-to-squeeze-your-irrisistable-chubby-legs-coming-out-of-the-onesie, piece of baby attire EVER!!) is to be found.
Especially some that are floating around the internet these days....and it's like a little punch in the gut knowing I have no use for it/can't buy it:

 {Oh! Those thunder thighs!  Just tell me you don't want to squeeze!}

SECOND, I walk by the nursery at church.....and I keep on walking.  After all those years of dropping off and picking up AND stopping to peek in the window "just to check" on my child, now I don't - and never will again.  There's NO REASON to look in through the window anymore.  But, sometimes I do just because........well, I have no idea WHY?!?   It's weird.  I'm not part of THAT club anymore.

THIRD, it was the realization that I no longer need to shop in the infant & toddler section of the stores - I just pass right on by.  What?!?  I've been browsing that department for the last 19 years!  And I almost can't stand it.  PLEASE!  Invite me to your baby showers, so I can go back!!


But, FINALLY, the strangest thing of all - the thing that REALLY hit me - was when my daughters brought home that demographic/contact info/profile thing-a-ma-jig-er form that we HAVE TO FILL OUT LIKE THREE TIMES A SCHOOL YEAR, and there's a section on that form where we are suppose to list all preschool age & younger children living in our home (so they can plan for future student body numbers).  I have ALWAYS written names here.  But, now there are NONE.  NADA.  For the first time EVER - in the 75 forms I've filled out during the years - I left those lines BLANK.

Yep.  I'M IN UNCHARTERED TERRITORY!  (for me)

What a Difference 31 Years Make

Haylee had her 12th Birthday this week!

And, as such, she got an exciting visit from her new Young Women's Leader, welcoming her.  She'll be entering the Beehive class now!!!  (She couldn't be more pleased - especially since she gets to go to mutual [weekly youth activity] tonight!)

One of the things that she received from her leader during that visit was her own necklace that has the Young Women's motto and logo on the pendant, "Stand For Truth and Righteousness."

{You may have noticed olympic medalist, Noelle Pikus-Pace wearing her own Young Women torch necklace on the medal stand this past winter olympics.}

Haylee immediately put it on after the leader left our home.

It's like a TRUE SIGN that she is an official Young Woman!

Then I told her that I had received the same necklace when I was a Young Woman!  

And then I thought.....

In fact, I THINK I still have mine!  I informed her.

And I went to search for it.

Found it!

But, I had to laugh at the difference.....on a petite, 65 lb., li'l 12 year old girl......

.....it looks like a LONG necklace.

And on a [more mature] lady who is.....well.....MUCH GREATER than 65 lbs. AND a foot taller....

....it's like a CHOKER!

{Time to buy a longer chain}

I guess that's a TRUE SIGN that I'm the opposite of a Young Woman!  : (

Resolutions Report

I know, I know.....January is already A THIRD of the way over and I haven't even made my New Year's Resolutions for 2014, yet!  What a slacker.  ;) 
I'm hesitant to do it.....and I think I know WHY.  It MAY have something to do with the fact that I already KNOW I wasn't even 100% on my last year's ones!
I wrote them on this blog o' mine, to hold myself accountable, so it's not like I could just "forget" about them ever existing!  {darn}

But, maybe I have to "close out" 2013 before I can move on to 2014???
So, here's the "Report."

1. Invite another couple to go out to dinner with us every month 
THIS one was suppose to be a FUN goal!  And it was......when we could get another couple to accept our invitation, that is!  ;)

THANKS FOR THE GOOD TIMES:

Page's

Sears'

Maxwell's

Knudsen's

Badham's

Lacy's

Waters'

Peterson's

Bryson's

Wood's

It actually turned out to be really tricky....and I hadn't expected it to be!  

At times, I had a High School Flashback - like I was getting turned down for dates, and all!  (Not that I asked too many people out on dates in H.S., but all those awkward/vulnerable/rejection/uneasy/wanting-to-be-accepted gumbo feelings are all related)  Matt, the eternal optimist, would try to tell me that people's schedules are just busy and it's hard to always match up with ours.  And, also, that a surprising number of couples are not even used to going out on weekly, or even monthly, dates.  I, on the other hand, assumed it meant that all these people who had excuses weren't able to go would rather poke needles in their eyes than go out with US!  (Is it ME?  Is it MATT?  Or is it the combination of the two of us?)  We take showers, and Matt wears cologne!!  (maybe THAT IS the issue? ;))
Report:  So, we actually were able to go out with another couple 11 out of the 12 months this year.  
BUT, I will confess; one month, we got invited - by relatives - and we "counted" it anyway.  The other month we missed, we happened to be at Station Park on the very last day, and we ran into some others we knew, and we sat together at an outdoor table to eat our treats, and talked for just a little while.....Matt thinks we should "count" that, too, and call it 100% accomplished!  
But, I'm more.....shall we say, "exact" in observing the rules, so if you ask me, I don't count either of those, and we only had 10 out of 12 for 83%.  
BUT, on the other hand, if you read the wording in the goal, it actually says TO INVITE another couple out, not actually TO GO (I just had the misconception that the two would go hand in hand).  So, looking at the goal LITERALLY, we WERE 100% in our inviting - even 110% - because sometimes we invited multiple couples before we got any takers.  So, YEA, check that one off, after all!?!

2. Get ready IN THE MORNING
I thought this one would be hard....and it was.
There is such a PULL for me to just hit the ground running in the morning to get things done - and getting ready just seems to get in the way of all that!  So, I really had to force myself to do this against my own natural urges.
Report:  I did this usually 5 out of 7 days (with Saturday frequently being the day I didn't)  So, I was about 71%.  Which is 5X better than it was before I started this goal! says Matt, the eternal optimist.  But, it's still not an instinctive habit.  {dang}

3. Write more on my blog
Even thought I really enjoy this one....it was hard to get it done!  There were too many days that had no blogging time in them. 
Report:  I had a frequency in my head, that I kept quiet - AND was super lofty, of how often I wanted to write on my blog.  Did I reach that number?  No.
BUT, again, if you read the wording in the goal, it actually says to write MORE.  So, looking at the goal LITERALLY (and the yearly count blogger so conveniently adds up for me) I did indeed write more than in 2012 and in 2011!  So, check it off?  Sure! says Matt, the eternal optimist.....or is that defined as a "short cutter?"  ;)   

4. Healthier Lifestyle
OK.....remember how I was going to introduce a new healthy thing per month and write on my blog about it?  Well, I did it in January, February, and March.....and then STOPPED!  Well, I stopped writing about it after March, and I stopped doing anything new one month later, in April.  I didn't even get to the "eat breakfast" month or the "reduce soda" month, let alone the "control your condiments/toppings" month or "more sleep" month.  (Probably because I knew they were too lofty?!?)
Report:  I sucked it up on this one.  Even though, I planned and announced my new thing those first few months, I never did do well at weight lifting in February, so I give myself a 16%.  And that's not even me being my usual "hard on myself/holding myself to high expectations" self!  That's the cold, hard truth.  Matt even has no comment.

5. Make new recipes out of ward cookbook
This totally should've been easy, and yummy....but I kinda forgot about it for the majority of the year, AND I had a heck of a time finding coconut pudding mix! (pina colada dip)
Report:  Buffalo Dip - check!
Famous Dip - check!
Pina Colada Fruit Dip - not until just last week, so it was already 2014....and since this was a 2013 goal, I was 66%.  (But, Matt would tell me to "count" it, of course!)  ;)

Final Verdict?  According to me:  I flopped!  According to Matt:  I achieved!
So, now that I've analyzed it all and "talked through" the rulings some, MAYBE I CAN do something for 2014.....

It is with great reluctance, I present to you my goals for the new year:
 
I saw THIS on Pinterest which I'm interested in, so here goes:

5 BOOKS I WANT TO READ:
(Let's go with the ones that are on my shelf right now)
She Got Up Off the Couch (a sequel to the one I was reading back here)
Reached
Fairy Godmothers, Inc.
The Book of Mormon (before our "Moroni's Quest" Youth Conference in June)
My Story (Elizabeth Smart)

4 PLACES I WANT TO SEE:
Nauvoo, IL
Cape Canaveral, FL (specifically the Ron Jon Cape Caribe Resort)
the different islands in Hawaii (via cruise?)
Disneyland

3 THINGS I WANT TO DO:
Be in the family cast of the Nauvoo Pageant
Finish Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons with Brookelle
Fill those empty spaces in our home with furniture & finally hanging things on the walls.

2 THINGS I WANT TO LEARN:
Gluten-Free baking/cooking
How to do a photo slideshow with music

1 THING I WANT TO CHANGE:
Give more compliments/encouragement to others.


There was also THIS ONE on Pinterest that I thought I'd do.  (some things are the same as above)

A BAD HABIT I'M GOING TO BREAK:  Staying up late (when I don't HAVE to because of work)...just to do [sometimes frivolous] things like surfing the internet, late-night T.V., and "getting one more thing done."  {Don't look at the time stamp of this post!} ;)

A NEW SKILL I'D LIKE TO LEARN:  See questionnaire above

A PERSON I'D LIKE TO BE MORE LIKE:  Jesus Christ - particularly His attributes of being calm, non-judgmental, & patient.  (Did I just describe Matt?  I believe I did!  Opposites attract?!?)

A GOOD DEED I'M GOING TO DO:  Keeping this one to myself....I want it to be anonymous!  ;)

A PLACE I'D LIKE TO VISIT:  See questionnaire above

A BOOK I'D LIKE TO READ:  See questionnaire above

A LETTER I'M GOING TO WRITE:  Maybe my OWN MISSIONARY SON? (possibly at the end of the year?)  If not, my Young Women at church or my children's Primary teachers - ANY or ALL.

A NEW FOOD I'D LIKE TO TRY:  Korean or Indian - our neighbors said they know some good places to take us!

I'M GOING TO DO BETTER AT:  Exercising in the winter.  My friend has recommended Bikini Body Mommy.  Apparently, it has a work out every day - and it started on Jan. 6th.....and I am going to start sometime....anytime now!  ;)

I shall look back on this post next year and either be really proud of myself....or extremely disappointed...

WHAT 2014 GOALS DO YOU HAVE?

The Last of a First

MY BABY lost her first tooth today!

Except BABIES don't lose teeth.....

Which means......

She's probably NOT a baby anymore....???

It is kind of alarming to think about.

All of a sudden it was hard for me to swallow.

Should I cheer?

Or should I cry?

It felt quite eerie to me.

I have had "LITTLE CHILDREN" for so long.....
(17 2/3 years to be exact)
...that somehow it seemed like I would have them forever....

And with the loss of a tooth....it's a sign that the "little" is on it's way out.

I've thought about the "someday" when I would no longer be in the "little" stage all these year a lot, no doubt - but it was always an unreachable future (far off future) date!

Basically, I never thought this day would come.

And it just did.

I kind of have a headache.

And my teeth are chattering.
(But that may be because it's 11:30 at night and I just drank a whole cup of ice cold water.)

I'm amazed.  And confused.
(Name that song & artist!)

Miss B was SO eager to show all her brothers & sisters as they came home from school one by one.
(She claims she can "whistle" out the hole, now.  It's more like a "blow", but whatever!)

I was really excited along with her as they each reacted with delight.....
And then I kinda wanted to pretend it didn't happen, too, all at the same time.

When I think about it, the "word" that comes to my mind is "Uh Oh" - as my eyes dart this way and that way and I wonder, Am I in the Twilight Zone?

It is an unfamiliar, mystifying place to be!

*******
In other news, the normally irresponsible, extremely tardy, down-right neglectful Tooth Fairy has already made the visit!  The money is waiting under her pillow as we speak (or write).

He's (she?) trying to redeem him(her?)self.

You see, I think the promptness & dependable behavior of the Tooth Fairy can be explained by the fact that at the very moment her actual tooth came out, I was in my office, with the door closed, working, and she was eating a corn dog in the kitchen (she bit into the stick, and out came her tooth!)  I heard a little cry/whimper, but then it stopped.  A minute later, she came into my office and got up into my face, with her mouth open (and a bit bloody) and let out a moan of sorts - to my surprise, she'd lost a tooth!  And THEN I realized I had MISSED it!  The last first tooth juncture of any of my children - GONE!  And then I berated myself.  I know!  Mother of the Year material right there.
(Although, if I were being realistic, losing a tooth happens away from home [& Mom] all the time.  My other children have lost them at school quite a bit, in fact.  Heck!  I lost my first tooth on the school bus - because I was biting on the seat in front of me. [gross!] )
But, still.....I expect MORE THAN reality.....it's a surefire way to go insane! 

Excuse Me While I Have a Little Freak Out

Guess where I went last night?

I still can't believe it myself.

I went to the Utah State University open house with my oldest to get some famous Aggie Ice Cream find out all about them, enter to win prizes..... 

AND TO APPLY FOR COLLEGE!

(But I DID enjoy me some Aggie ice cream, too.  

Sadly, the Aggie Blue Mint was all gone by the time we got there, though!)

AM I OLD ENOUGH to be sending my own offspring away to college?!?

Wasn't I just there myself?

 Along with my husband, too?

Didn't I just give birth to him?

 

Weren't we just spending our days on the couch in our apartment doing this?

 

Wait a minute!  He just started Kindergarten, didn't he?

And his Baptism was just the other day.

Didn't he just barely become a teenager?

Well, the fact that he went to the Homecoming Dance last Saturday,

most likely makes the answers to all those questions - a "NO!!"

But, I STILL can't believe it!  Only OLD people have college students, don't they?  I am a tad bit freaked out by this thought!!  It's already time to start making plans for his bedroom?  Hmmmm......A ladies workout room?  A music room?  A napping room?  A library?

There was one thing, a rude awakening,  that has really let us know that the years really HAVE  past by and things have changed.......back in my husband's day, he got the Presidential Scholarship (4 years tuition & fees all paid) at USU.  TODAY, with his same scores (GPA and ACT), he wouldn't even qualify!!  In fact, he would only be awarded the very lowest level of scholarship they give out for academics.  One that wouldn't even cover one semester!  You practically have to be perfect for the big scholarships these days.  

Otherwise, kids, get ready to pay out the BIG BUCKS!

Now Ryan's wishing he fought off his "brain-dead-teenage-boy-season-of-life" with MORE of a vengeance. 

All is not lost.  There are other scholarships he can go for - totally depending on how much work HE is willing to put in to applying/making a portfolio, etc.

He's still hangin' in there in his attempt to get the Regents Scholarship by taking AP Statistics, AP US Government, Biology, and Spanish 2 his Senior year (which aren't even required to graduate, but are required for this scholarship) instead of underwater basket weaving (or any frivolous classes) that his peers, who aren't trying for scholarships, get to take.

But, fortunately for him, because his AWESOME PARENTS are Utah State University ALUMNI, he can qualify for a small scholarship to attend there.

AND, there is even another [small] scholarship for VHS students who are children of Viewmont H.S. alumni!

Who knew there was actually a PRO to having a child of mine go to "Pee-yew"mont?!?  ;)

(my High School rival)

My New Baby was Delivered Last Week

After having THE SAME washing machine our whole entire marriage (18 yrs. 11 months), we had to finally replace it.  {boo hoo!}
My grandma had bought it brand new for herself about 22ish years ago. She only got to use it for a year or two before she passed away.
Then it sat in my parents' mudroom/garage for about a year and a half until I got married and became the proud owner of it.

Over the years, we'd had a "Maytag Man" come out and service it a few times and he kept telling me, "They don't make 'em like this anymore!" And he would gush about how good it was - and I felt pretty lucky to have "inherited" it.   BTW, it's matching dryer is still plugging along for us!

The appliance salesman told me that I should only expect a new one to last about 12 years now.  WHAT?!?   So, it's got HALF the life expectancy of my beloved whose spin ability just failed...and we spent 3 weeks mourning the loss...and then when everyone ran out of clothes and the piles were stacked to high heaven, we were forced to buy a new one...? (because the repair charge would be about a third of the cost of a brand new one, and we already fixed it once.)

So I present to you My New Baby:

No dust and crud build-up.  And it has a non-slamming lid.

I guess the "new ones" don't have agitators (that pole sticking up in the middle) anymore,

and I was having a problem with that in the store.

Because HOW are the clothes going to get as clean when they're not AGITATED?

Do any of you even know what I'm talking about - or was my machine THAT old?

But, I'm most excited about the size of the drum - look at all that room.  Hello bigger loads!!!

My children (OK, maybe not Ryan) could play hide-n-seek in there - although I don't encourage that!

My old one had 6 buttons:  small, medium, large and hot, warm, cold.

Now look at this panel of confusion!

But, I'm still that person using a flip cell phone with push-buttons, so this is a tad above my level!  ;)

Like I'd been told, They sure don't make 'em like they used to! 

But, I figured it out - And I spent the next day doing all the backed up laundry.....yeah!

Reality Bites

I was in an airport recently and I saw someone who looked familiar......but I couldn't immediately place the source of where I knew her from.

Was it College?  (one of the THREE I attended)

My Mission?

My job?

An old job?

My old neighborhood?

I couldn't quite come up with a name....but I kept seeing her.....and as a result I kept looking at her, too.

I first saw her when her group and my group (my daughter & I) were both converging onto the escalator.  And I took a double-take.

Then she was right behind me in the security line.  I looked at her again - and she saw me doing so, but she said nothing, so then I thought maybe I didn't know her.  Except I was pretty sure I did!

Then when I was standing in line at the airport Cafe Rio, I saw her enter the food court.  By this time, I was sneaking in more glances - pretty much staring - until our eyes would meet again while I was doing so.

Then when I had sat down to eat, it came to me!  It was a girl from High School.  Not just a girl, but a friend - like I had hung out at her house before!  We didn't do everything together, not like BEST FRIENDS, but we were "medium friends".....I think we might have group dated to a Girls' Dance?  (But, don't quote me on that - those years' activities are getting foggier and more distant!)  But, I don't think I have seen her since then.

So, THEN, having now recalled who she was, I decided to acknowledge and greet her.
So, when she & her husband started walking right towards my table, carrying their food tray, to get to their table, I kind of reached out my hand in a wave, to get her attention, and said, "You look familiar to me."

To which she reacted with an absolute. BLANK. look. on her face.
It was almost a skeptical look like why-the-heck-is-a-complete-[flipped-out]-stranger-making-advances-at-me? look.  (Her body Language: she stopped in her tracks and leaned back away from me.)

I then asked, "Are you (insert her name)?"

She seriously had NO sign of recognition on her face.

She said nothing.  She just stared back at me.

(I started to wonder if I had gotten it all wrong.  That she wasn't really who I had thought.)
When her facial expression did not change, I was about to say, "Nevermind." 

But, then her husband answered for her (since, apparently, my greeting had rendered her mute).  He said, "Yes.  Yes she is."

I could tell she still couldn't identify ME, so I said, "I'm Suzanne."

[Still no "A-ha" moment.]

So, I continued by saying my maiden name, too.

And then she [unconvincingly] said, "Oh.....yah...."
(and then we chit chatted for a few minutes.)


But, afterwards, as I reviewed the scenario in my mind, I knew what had happened.

What a slap in the face, but it was true.  She could not even tell a resemblance from my High School self that she had known to my Present day self  who'd "stalked" her at the airport.

It means I have changed too much!

And that is alarming!

It's stupefying what 25 years can do to a person.
{and depressing.}  

REALITY:  I can't pass as a 17 yr. old anymore!!! 

What d'ya think?  Would YOU have been able to even recognize me?

High School Senior

[feeling like a] Senior Citizen

It was probably just because I'm not using a tight curling iron and ratting my hair these days, right?!?

RIGHT?!?

Okay....good.

5th Grade Rite of Passage

A couple of weeks ago, Haylee brought home the permission slip for the Maturation Program at school.

When did she grow up?

I guess in my mind, because she is SO LITTLE (Just 50" tall and 57 lbs. at [almost] age 11) she is STILL a little girl.  AND the fact that her doll house still gets so much playing time from her.  AND that she loves for me to read her children's storybooks still.  AND that she always wants to lay her head on my lap in church and have me scratch/tickle her back and run my fingers through her hair - sometimes she even falls asleep while I'm doing this - although she INSISTS she doesn't ever need naps!  :)  AND that, due to her lingering speech impairment, she sounds like a little girl when she talks.  AND she has NOT caught "Bieber Fever" - there's no interest in pop stars at all, really - she doesn't even know most their names!

BUT, then there's the [practically daily] lashing out, the slamming of doors, the stomping around, the ripping drawers off their track because she yanks them open with such force, the screaming, the crying, the angry contortions her face makes, with the vicious look in her eyes......and then I'm reminded:  She is, in fact, closer to her teen years than she is to her young child years now.  

Matt already did the Maturation Program with Ryan and Kyle six and three years ago, respectively.......WHAT THE WHAT?!?  It's been that long since my first babies attended the BIG MEETING?!?

I'm forty-two years old, this shouldn't surprise me.  But it does.

Maybe it's because I can still vividly remember my own maturation program from elementary school.  I was just there, too, wasn't I?  Or maybe I remember it so well because of the bit of traumatic factor surrounding it.

The nurse who gave the presentation THIS YEAR to Haylee's class did a great job.  She explained that even a generation or two ago, these kind of things were not talked about, which made it feel scary or bad.  I totally agreed with her comment.

Back in my day, I didn't even know anything about a maturation program existing - no one ever told me - until I got the note announcing it.  At that time, other 5th Graders told me what it was, so then I was really nervous to give the note to my mom - and when I did, we never talked about it, at all.  In fact, I didn't even know if she was going to come for sure or not because we didn't even talk about that.  I remember on "the big day," the secretary from the office called into our classroom's P.A. system announcing it was time for all the girls to go down to the Multi-Purpose room.  As we got up to walk out, all the boys in our class started their snickering and disrespectful snorts at us - which made us feel even more stupid!  (Back in those days, the boys had their meeting in the evening with their dads, so the boys stayed in class.)   I was so anxious on the walk to the Multi-Purpose room because I wasn't sure my mom would even be there - she'd said nothing about coming.....so did that mean she was coming or she wasn't coming???  I didn't know, but I thought it meant she wasn't.  If she wasn't there, I was so worried about having to sit alone while everyone else was with their mom.  IMAGINE MY RELIEF when I walked in and saw my mom there!  WHEW!!!  My mom asked me afterwards, "Do you have any questions?"  I immediately [rep]lied, "NO!"  And that was that.

Afterwards, I got my first, very own stick of deodorant.  How "grown up!"  They didn't give that to Haylee - what a rip off!  ;)  Budget cuts???

Before the program, I'd already told Haylee all the body changes we would probably talk about (hair growth, hip & chest curvy-ness, growing taller, sweating problems, periods, zits...maybe even braces) and she informed me she thought it was all gross and she didn't want to do any of it.

Well, guess what?!?  You don't have a choice, sweetie!  It's inevitable.   Aaaaaaaaaauuhhh!

At the actual meeting, they talked about all that and more....because, honestly, I didn't take the time to read the School District program overview ahead of time.  They talked about the whole reason the body is changing is to prepare itself to have babies; for pregnancy, delivery, and nursing.  BUT JUST BECAUSE the physical body is capable DOES NOT MEAN girls are ready to have babies.  I thought that was great!  They also showed a slide of an Encyclopedia-type diagram of a side view of male anatomy, so girls would know the difference.  They closed with a video that showed a fast series of shots of a [ordinary] girl who went into a photo shoot and was "transformed" with the aid of all these make up artists and hair stylists working on her.  And then they showed the photo shop process to get the "end product" which looked ENTIRELY different from the first girl.....really couldn't even see a resemblance!  The nurse talked about how the photo that made it up on the billboard was a FAKE PERSON!   And that we should never compare ourselves to those airbrushed photos.  Fantastic!

Afterwards, we stayed in the car, with a bag of Nutter Butter snacks, and talked about the meeting more.

 

(I know the way to Haylee's heart! I know how to get her attention!) 

I asked her if she had any questions....
Turns out she had NO CLUE what the photo shop/model video meant or that that kind of thing was even happening.  See what I mean?  Little girl.

I had to hold back my giggling at the next thing she brought up.  She asked, with the "yuck factor" tone of voice, "Why did they have to show us the boy parts?"  She said she already knew the difference and she didn't want to see the picture!

I told her that I think she is many years away from most of those body changes to happen to her (because she is living in a 7 yr. old body still)  She is OVERJOYED at my "prediction."

She decided she wants to start wearing deodorant when she starts her 6th Grade school year.

The last thing she said she wanted to talk about, with a mouthful of Nutter Butters, was BOOBS.  She said she was freaked out over the slide that depicted all the different stages of breast growth, from "chocolate chip" to "watermelon" size.  I told her it is a fact of life, but everybody is different.  To which she replied, I really hope I have small ones!
(I just smiled and refrained from commenting on what I was really thinking:  Your future husband is hoping for the exact opposite, Girl!)
;)

Good Thing I'm Not a Betting [Wo]Man

ONLY BECAUSE OF my and my husband's impending absence next week due to [hopefully] being on a Mexican Riviera cruise, we decided to let our 2 1/2-weeks-away-from-being-17-yrs.-old son get his Driver's License -- TEMPORARILY -- even though he has not obtained his Eagle Scout yet, (the prerequisite in this family) so he could be the chauffeur to and from all the places he and his siblings need to go in an average week - and it would not drive their caretakers absolutely INSANE with their crazy schedule that they aren't used to at all!

TEMPORARILY being the KEY WORD.  He can ONLY drive while we are gone.....when we return, we are taking his Driver's License away until he gets his Eagle Scout - or until we go out of town again - whichever comes first!  :)

So, I called the Driver's License Division to schedule his road test (as per instructions on their website.)  Well, in doing so, we found out that his Driver's Ed Instructor had never entered his results into the database, so they would not let me schedule an appointment until that happened.  I also found out that his Learner's Permit had expired 5 months ago, so he shouldn't have even been driving with us anymore!  (woops!)  But at least his written score was good for one more month and he didn't have to take THAT again (assuming he could pass the road test.)  So, I spent the next little while texting Ryan back & forth telling him to go talk to his teachers.  I, myself, was also calling the school and leaving voice messages on both the teacher of the class and his instructor he did his driving with....because we needed to get him in BEFORE we left town!  I made a few more calls to the DMV and between that all, we got the proof needed entered into the system.  LUCKILY, there was one cancellation this week that they could fit him in before we departed.

Then my son started texting me:
Why do I have to take a road test?

{Duh!!!}  So, they can determine if you're safe/good/smart enough to be out on the roads!!!  (I didn't actually text him that.)

I just told him someone from the State needs to put their "stamp of approval" on his license, if he's going to get one.

Then he told me that NONE OF HIS FRIENDS had to take the test.....that they already did it in Driver's Ed.

Yeah, right!!  (I thought)  These dumb silly teenagers!

I tried to tell him that all those driving hours he did were JUST his driving PRACTICE & EDUCATION, not an actual test.

Are you SURE?  he asked.

Of course!  I'm the Mom.....besides that's just the way it was back in my day when I was 16 (+ 5 weeks!)  I had to take the test.  Your Dad had to take the test.  Everyone has to take the test!

So, I checked him out of school - out of his hardest class, Calculus, no less - for the ONLY available appointment all week to take him to the Driver's License Division.

The whole way there he was complaining about him not thinking this was neccesary, and that no one he knows has taken a road test with some government official.....and that HE'S MISSING CALCULUS!!!
He asked me some form of "Are you sure?" and "Why?" a half a dozen times on the ride there.

In between all his comments, I was coaching him on making sure NOT to speed or drive up into any of the snow banks, or else they would flunk him on the spot.  I also told him he would FOR SURE have to either parallel park or make a 3+ point turn.  AND on top of that, snow had started to lightly fall, so he'd have to be very careful, as well.

I had him clean out the car and put everything into a bag so the "judge" wouldn't get a bad first impression and not pass him right from the beginning.  I also brought a book and other activities for myself and Miss B. to occupy ourselves with during his hour long(?) road test.

We (I) filled out his application (he still doesn't know our new home address) and took it up to the counter......and then I told the receptionist that my son thought he didn't have to take the road test due to having passed Driver's Ed.  Funny boy, isn't he?!?

AND THEN......

.......she checks in her handy dandy computer.....and says, "THAT'S RIGHT.  We've got his "Certificate of Completion" right here!"

WHAT?!?

ALL HE HAD TO DO was get his picture taken and pay $30.00 (well, I did.)  And it turns out he could've done that any dang time of the day -- WITHOUT an appointment -- and especially NOT during Calculus class.  We were in and out of there in less than 30 minutes, with his new D.L. in hand!

What happened to the way things were done "Back in MY day?"  I had to go out alone with some intimidating, uniformed, stranger dude..... and make a U-TURN in our family's big Suburban!  (Apparently, that part IS done as part of Driver's Ed. in the schools these days.  Who knew?  Not me.)


The whole way back to school, my son kept saying, "WE TOTALLY SHOULD'VE BET ON THIS!"

Called to Serve

My neice opened her Mission call tonight.
We all went up to their house to witness this EXCITING event.
There was my family of 7 and about 100 other people there, too.  Really, maybe half that many.  Or a third.  I really don't know how many, but there were enough to make quite a ruckous with our cheering and clapping when she read aloud her mission she has been called to serve in.

MADRID, SPAIN

And the shouts continued when she read from her call that she will report directly to the Missionary Training Center (MTC) in SPAIN - not the traditional one in Provo, Utah that everyone else in the family has gone to.

And the noise [of gladness & congratulations] burst out again when she read that she will start her mission on June 12, 2013.

I am thrilled for her!

With the new announcement from the Prophet, Thomas S. Monson, at last October's General Conference that the new age for women to serve a full-time mission was changed to age 19 instead of 21,  she immediately was eligible since she was already 19 yrs. old!  There is now a SURGE of women submitting their missionary applications -- and I think IT. IS. WONDERFUL.  Sister Missionaries are SO effective and amazing.  They were THE BEST in my mission, but, unfortunately, we were in the minority......but things are changing now with the lower age!  Amongst some of my neice's other "fans" there to watch, there were three other girls who had their mission calls, too!!  It's so great.

Being there tonight, I couldn't help but recall receiving my OWN mission call.

Although, my experience 21 1/2 years ago was very, very different from hers today, it still brought back the EMOTION associated with it..  Tears filled my eyes as I listened to her read her call, just the same as they have the other few times I have been privileged to be a bystander when future missionaries have opened their calls.....BECAUSE I KNOW what it's like to open a Mission Call.  I have been there!  The tears were there when I opened my OWN call, too.  It is SO important and SO profound.  It is SO BIG - a call to serve from The Prophet.

After being a part of her "Mission Call Opening Party" with the masses, Matt asked me if it made me wish I would've done it like THAT.

No.

That may surprise some because I am very much a "social creature" by nature and a "People Person" who loves friends and being around others.  USUALLY.  But, opening my mission call was NOT a USUAL experience.
There is not a wrong way and a right way to do it.  The way I did it was just PERFECT FOR ME!

I chose to open my Mission Call all by myself, in private, out in nature, next to a river in the beautiful surroundings of Logan Canyon in Northern Utah back in the summer of 1991.

I wanted to have my own true, REAL initial reaction to the call - without having to "put on a show" for an audience.

So, when I learned of my call, FUKUOKA, JAPAN, there was no fanfare.  No deafening crowds whooping and hollering.  No eyes on me - at least not of the human kind.  But I felt very, very close to my Heavenly Father & Jesus at that moment - I KNEW They were with me.

(Signed by Ezra Taft Benson, the Prophet in 1991)

Even though I am "Geographically Deficient" and I didn't even know WHERE Japan was....North?  South?  East?  West of here?  Even though I had indicated on my application that I was NOT interested in learning a foreign language....  And even though I [might have] exclaimed, "Holy Cha!" when I read it, I immediately prayed - right then and there on that big boulder I was sitting on out in the open air.  I was surrounded with just the sound of the trickling water, the fluttering of leaves in the trees up above and the occasional chirping of a bird.  And as I did so, I felt The Spirit confirming to me that I was "up to the challenge!"

For DAYS afterwards, it still seemed like an "Out of body experience" to think about ME serving a mission in Japan.  I still can't believe that I did it sometimes, now!   But, that day will always be a tender memory for me.

I did go to my parents home the next day where the rest of my "groupies" had gathered and I "opened" my Mission Call (however I already knew where I was going) in front of them.  Then they were all made privy to the BIG NEWS for the first time -- and they shared in my joy and excitement, too.  So, I got BOTH - a private and a public opening - I've always been one to prolong the CELEBRATION as much as possible!  ;)  haha.

GO Sister Missionaries! 

(This plaque hung in the glass case at our church building the whole time I was gone.)